登陆注册
1578600000008

第8章 爱是人类最美丽的语言 (2)

On one hand, the instant is easier and requires one bowl. No muss. No fuss. But too many times in my life I have taken the easy way. Oh yes, I have reached my goal in the process. But to what gain? Instant stuff brings little satisfaction in life. A solid success that one hangs proudly on the wall is one that requires the same special attention as “cook and serve” pudding.

我在超市的过道上站了近十分钟,试图做出一个简单的决定:买哪种布丁。在我的生活中,任何标有“速食或速溶”说明的东西总会吸引我的注意。然而,我突然想起母亲烹制“即做即食”的巧克力布丁的场景。

我站在超市里,回想起自己孩提时等候在炉子旁,看着母亲慢慢地搅动布丁直到它呈现出奶油色如天鹅绒般柔软而醇厚的状态的那个情景。我看着她把做好的布丁倒进杯子里,然后会有一些粘在罐子的内壁,这诱惑我拿起用来搅拌的勺子刮出罐子里的每一点布丁,直到把它刮得干干净净,几乎不用再清洗。

制作这种美味的餐后甜点需要耐心和时间,而这两者正是我现今的生活所缺乏的。

一方面,速食食物更方便,只需要一只碗就好。不会弄得一团糟,也无需劳师动众。但是在生活中,我过多地选择了最便捷的方式。噢,是的,我在这个过程中达到了目的。然而,我获得了什么?速食的东西并不能给生活带来什么满足感。一份令人自豪的踏实的成就需要像烹制“即做即食”的布丁那样特别的用心。

True Love Always Prevails 真爱胜过一切

True love is that we stick together in “thick and thin”. Especially when it’s thin, when it’s troublesome. Then we should really bridge over the “troubled water”. That’s what they say in English. But most of us fail the test, to ourselves, not to our partners. He might leave you; he might stay with you, because you’re nice or not nice. But you fail yourself. You leave yourself. You leave the noblest being that you really are. So we should check up on this to our family members or whomever that is beloved and dear to us. Most of the time in critical situations, we just turn our backs and that is no good.

Of course we have our anger, our frustrations, because our partners are not as loving as usual, or whomever that is; but he or she is in a different situation. At that time, she or he is in mental suffering. It’s just as bad as or even worse than physical suffering. Physical suffering you can take a pill or you can have an injection and it stops or at least temporarily stops, and you feel the effect right away; or at least if people are in physical suffering, everyone sympathizes with them.

But when they are in mental anguish, and we pound them more on that, and we turn our backs and become cold and indifferent, that is even crueler, even worse. That person will be swimming alone in suffering. And especially they trust us as the next of kin, the next person, the one that they think they can rely on in times of need; and then at that time, we just turn around and are snobbish, because they didn’t treat us nice so we just want to revenge. That’s not the time. You can revenge later, when he’s in better shape. Just slap him.

Actually, at that time, the person is not his usual self anymore. He was probably under very great pressure that he lost his own control. It’s not really lost his own control, but for example, when you are in a hurry, your talk is different. Right? “Hand me that coat! Quick! Quick! Quick!” Things like that. But normally, you would say “Honey, please, can you give me that coat.” Is that not so? Or when you’re in pain —for example stomach pain, heartache or whatever—you scream loudly; and anyone who comes to talk to you, you don't talk in the usual way anymore, because you’re in pain.

Similarly, when you are in a mental or psychological pain, you talk also in a very grouchy way, very cross. But that is understandable. So if we—any so-called loving partner or family member—do not understand even this very least, very basic concept, then we’re finished. Then we are really in a bad situation. It’s not that the partner will do anything to us. Whether he does anything to us later or not, that is no problem. The problem is us. The problem is we degrade ourselves, that we make less of a being of ourselves than we should be, than we are supposed to be, or that we really are. So do not make less of a being of yourselves.

真爱是不管情况好坏都在一起,特别是当情况不好、有麻烦的时候,更应该如俗话所说的“兵来将挡,水来土掩”,想办法克服困难。但是大部分人都不能通过这项考验而背离了自己,而不是背离了我们的伴侣。因为不论你好或不好,你的伴侣留下或是离开,是你自己通不过考验,背离了你自己,背弃了内在真正高贵的你,所以我们应该检查自己对家人或任何我们所钟爱的人的关系,通常在关键的时刻我们反而背弃他们,这样很不好。

当然我们也会觉得生气、挫折,因为我们的伴侣不再像以前一样可爱,不过这是因为他(她)正处在不同的状况,精神正受煎熬。精神痛苦和生理的痛苦一样难受,有时候甚至更糟。生理的痛苦可以用吃药或打针来制止,至少可以暂时止痛,可以马上见效;或者至少身体受苦时,大家都会同情她。

可是当有人处在心理的极度痛苦时,我们却落井下石,背弃他,变得冷漠不关心,这是更残忍、更糟糕的事,那个人就只能孤孤单单地在痛苦中挣扎。尤其他们信任我们是最亲密的人,认为在需要时可以信靠,可是我们却很势利转身离去,只是因为他们不再对我们好或是我们只是想要报复。这真不是时候!你可以等一下再报复,等他好一点时,打他一巴掌。

事实上,那时候那个人已经不再是平常的他,可能已因压力极大而失去控制;也不完全是失去控制,而是像当你很匆忙时,说话的语气自然会不一样,你会说:“拿外衣给我,快快快!”而在平常你则会说:“亲爱的,能不能请你拿那件外衣给我。”是不是这样?或当你在痛苦时,像是胃痛或头痛时你会大叫,人家来看你时你也无法像平常那样谈话,因为你正痛得不得了。

同样的,当你处在精神或心理的疼痛时,你的谈话自然会显得粗暴,但这是可以理解的。如果我们这些所谓的爱的伴侣或家人不知道这最起码、最基本的观念,我们就完了,我们会很糟糕。并非另一半会对我们怎样,无论对方以后有没有对我们怎样,那都不是问题,问题是在我们自己——我们贬低了自己,不配自己应有的身份,所以千万不要贬低自己。

Who Gave Me the Ears是谁给我的耳朵

“Can I see my baby?” the happy new mother asked.

When the bundle was nestled in her arms and she moved the fold of cloth to look upon his tiny face, she gasped. The doctor turned quickly and looked out the tall hospital window. The baby had been born without ears.

Time proved that the baby’s hearing was perfect. It was only his appearance that was marred. When he rushed home from school one day and flung himself into his mother’s arms, she sighed, knowing that his life was to be a succession of heartbreaks.

He blurted out the tragedy. “A boy, a big boy...called me a freak.”

同类推荐
  • 用英语介绍中国:这里是上海

    用英语介绍中国:这里是上海

    阅读可以提升人格情操,增长知识,提高语言文化的综合素质,其更本质、更核心的意义在于培养学习者的兴趣,而兴趣才是一切学习者的学习动力、成功源泉。本书为读者奉上原汁原味的人文阅读精华,详细介绍了人们最感兴趣的上海历史文化、城市风景、上海生活、名人逸事等,带您全方位地了解上海。读者在学习英语的同时,又能品味这座东方文化名城的独特魅力。
  • 英语口语900句袋着走

    英语口语900句袋着走

    全书分为五大主题,120个话题,涉及校园、生活、工作、娱乐、旅行等老外从早到晚都在说的各方面内容。每一部分所包含的版块如下:经典句子 收集了跟生活场景相关的最经典实用的英语单句,掌握这些句子,为说出流畅的口语做好准备,夯实基础。实用对话 把每一个话题以现场交流对话的方式直观表达出来,让你觉得学英语不再枯燥、无聊!地道的表达,鲜活的语言,再现老外真实的生活场景。文化加油站  该部分包含英美文化、心灵鸡汤、名人演讲、名人访谈录等。浓缩经典,汇聚百态,在学习英语的同时增长见识,开阔眼界,提升自我。
  • 那些妙趣横生的故事(每天读一点英文)

    那些妙趣横生的故事(每天读一点英文)

    《每天读一点英文·那些妙趣横生的故事》是一套与美国人同步阅读的中英双语丛书。特点有三:内文篇目收录了最精彩、最新鲜的笑话;“实战提升”部分,包括单词和词组、知道不知道,让你捧腹大笑的同时,丰富知识面; 附赠地道美语朗读MP3光盘。 本书幽默逗趣,文字浅显易懂,让你笑着学英文!
  • 世界上最美的情诗

    世界上最美的情诗

    《世界上最美的情诗》从诗歌宝库中精选了百余篇具有代表性的篇章,所选篇目皆出自于名家之手,它们语言优美,意境深邃,篇篇可谓人类文明的共同财富。同时在本书内容的选择上也力求广泛,它们或讴歌大自然,或吟咏爱情,或感叹人生,可谓包罗人生的方方面面。
  • 美国名家短篇小说赏析(中级)

    美国名家短篇小说赏析(中级)

    本书精选了十二位美国文学巨匠的12篇美国短篇小说的精华之作,每篇文章前有简短的引言,文中还附有编者的评注和分析及作者简介。
热门推荐
  • 龙门留别道友

    龙门留别道友

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 总裁追妻:我们都不傲娇吧!

    总裁追妻:我们都不傲娇吧!

    陈乔恩化身高中生陈碧溪进入幻想空间拯救魔龙的女儿一一夏之晴。总裁云溪、校草景天,心不知选择谁?在死亡的那一刻获得了凤凰丹,获得重生。回归娱乐圈,总裁、校草又追来,好不容易选择一个,又偏偏出了车祸,打开那葵心空间,有那灵兽千芷葵心的相伴,云落大陆,教主来了!之后的故事还有很多,持续不断!
  • 当下的修行 要学会宽容

    当下的修行 要学会宽容

    《当下的修行:要学会宽容》从八个方面对宽容进行全面的阐述,行文流畅优美,语言生动细腻,深入浅出。全书精心挑选诸多案例,既汇集了古今中外名人的智慧,又延伸至普通百姓的日常生活。以事例说理,条分缕析,详细阐述了如何学会宽容,以理动人。相信该书会让读者在尘世的喧嚣中蓦然聆听到生命的真谛,得到心灵的净化和情感的释放,用心体会到人世间最美的乐章。
  • 万古仙尊

    万古仙尊

    元境陨落,位面崩溃,无穷能量凝结,天元神珠应运而生。少年姜逸峰自微末崛起,情仇加身,手持天元神珠,修远古吐纳之术,炼真龙九变之决,一路高歌猛进,横扫八荒六合!然天地阴阳缺失,世界崩塌在即,为补全天地被献祭者如过江之鲫,伊人红妆竟赴献祭之路!悲愤中,他如何重创天地,掌御诸天万界,主宰无尽苍穹,与她逍遥万古!
  • 陌上微微凉

    陌上微微凉

    一个被无数人仰望的传奇,校园里追捧的偶像名人是自己倾慕暗恋3年的浅影?新来的代课老师安锦瑟是他?佟青陌哀诉:老天,还我一个公道!锦瑟当着所有人的面对青陌说:“我们什么时候不是那种关系了?”青陌囧了,前脚才得知真相,后脚就被求婚?佟青陌一边继续囧着。一边已经被人拖着拽着去登记了。
  • 盛开于此世的曼珠沙华

    盛开于此世的曼珠沙华

    传说,曼珠沙华盛开在通往彼世的道路上,迎接死者的灵魂。当它盛开在此世时,便会以另一种形式将你带向永生。
  • 恶魔总裁的凶悍妻

    恶魔总裁的凶悍妻

    “喂,乐安,那个帅哥是谁啊?”哪个?林乐安一脸茫然。“喂,林乐安,你不要太过分哦,虽然你神经很大条啦,可是也不能这样忽略周围的人吧,你看那边那个帅哥,一直在看你耶。你没看见周围的骚动吗?简直是帅呆了啊。”林乐安顺着沈希颜看着的方向看过去,愣住了。“呵呵,你也有这种时候,原来我们乐安不是绝缘体啊。”沈希颜第一次看见这样的林乐安,可是却笑了,乐安,也有喜欢的人吧,正想着,就见林乐安已经离开了。再回头的时候,沈希颜下巴差一点掉在地上。林乐安全然的扑进男人的怀里,动作那样的亲昵,这可真是新闻了。
  • 血乱乾坤

    血乱乾坤

    这是一个没有信仰的时代,真正主宰这个世界的,只有力量!欲望支配力量,利益成就众生,在这个人们心中没有归属的地方,在这个动荡的年代,小小少年,得知了自己的身世,于狭缝中行走,于血海中成长。天为乾,地为坤,我血一怒,乾坤不存!
  • 观经

    观经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 哲理名言(当代教育丛书·现代名言妙语全集)

    哲理名言(当代教育丛书·现代名言妙语全集)

    这些名言警句句句经典,字字珠玑,精辟睿智,闪耀着智慧的光芒和精神的力量,具有很强的鼓舞性、哲理性和启迪性。具有成功心理暗示和潜在力量开发的功能,不仅可以成为我们的座右铭,还能增进自律的能力。