第4章

ERNEST.[coolly.]I suppose you'll admit the rule that one umpires one's own court.

COLONEL.[Hotly.]Certainly not,in this case!

MISS BEECH.[From behind the hollow tree.]Special case!

ERNEST.[Moving chin in collar--very coolly.]Well,of course if you won't play the game!

COLONEL.[In a towering passion.]If you lose your temper like this,I 'll never play with you again.

[To LETTY,a pretty soul in a linen suit,approaching through the wall.]

Do you mean to say that ball was out,Letty?

LETTY.Of course it was,Father.

COLONEL.You say that because he's your husband.[He sits on the rustic seat.]If your mother'd been there she'd have backed me up!

LETTY.Mother wants Joy,Dick,about her frock.

DICK.I--I don't know where she is.

MISS BEECH.[From behind the hollow tree.]Ahem!

LETTY.What's the matter,Peachey?

MISS BEECH.Swallowed a fly.Poor creature!

ERNEST.[Returning to his point.]Why I know the ball was out,Colonel,was because it pitched in a line with that arbutus tree.

COLONEL.[Rising.]Arbutus tree![To his daughter.]Where's your mother?

LETTY.In the blue room,Father.

ERNEST.The ball was a good foot out;at the height it was coming when it passed me.

COLONEL.[Staring at him.]You're a--you're aa theorist!From where you were you could n't see the ball at all.[To LETTY.]

Where's your mother?

LETTY.[Emphatically.]In the blue room,Father!

[The COLONEL glares confusedly,and goes away towards the blue room.]

ERNEST.[In the swing,and with a smile.]Your old Dad'll never be a sportsman!

LETTY.[Indignantly.]I wish you wouldn't call Father old,Ernie!

What time's Molly coming,Peachey?

[ROSE has come from the house,and stands waiting for a chance to speak.]

ERNEST.[Breaking in.]Your old Dad's only got one fault:he can't take an impersonal view of things.

MISS BEECH.Can you find me any one who can?

ERNEST.[With a smile.]Well,Peachey!

MISS BEECH.[Ironically.]Oh!of course,there's you!

ERNEST.I don't know about that!But--

ROSE.[To LETTY,]Please,Miss,the Missis says will you and Mr.

Ernest please to move your things into Miss Peachey's room.

ERNEST.[Vexed.]Deuce of a nuisance havin'to turn out for this fellow Lever.What did Molly want to bring him for?

MISS BEECH.Course you've no personal feeling in the matter!

ROSE.[Speaking to Miss BEECH.]The Missis says you're to please move your things into the blue room,please Miss.

LETTY.Aha,Peachey!That settles you!Come on,Ernie!

[She goes towards the house.ERNEST,rising from the swing,turns to Miss BEECH,who follows.]

ERNEST.[Smiling,faintly superior.]Personal,not a bit!I only think while Molly 's out at grass,she oughtn't to--MISS BEECH.[Sharply.]Oh!do you?

[She hustles ERNEST out through the wall,but his voice is heard faintly from the distance:"I think it's jolly thin."]

ROSE.[To DICK.]The Missis says you're to take all your worms and things,Sir,and put them where they won't be seen.

DICK.[Shortly.]Have n't got any!

ROSE.The Missis says she'll be very angry if you don't put your worms away;and would you come and help kill earwigs in the blue--?

DICK.Hang![He goes,and ROSE is left alone.]

ROSE.[Looking straight before her.]Please,Miss Joy,the Missis says will you go to her about your frock.

[There is a little pause,then from the hollow tree joy's voice is heard.]

JOY.No-o!

ROSE.If you did n't come,I was to tell you she was going to put you in the blue.

[Joy looks out of the tree.]

[Immovable,but smiling.]

Oh,Miss joy,you've done your hair up![Joy retires into the tree.]

Please,Miss,what shall I tell the Missis?

JOY.[Joy's voice is heard.]Anything you like.

ROSE.[Over her shoulder.]I shall be drove to tell her a story,Miss.

JOY.All right!Tell it.

[ROSE goes away,and JOY comes out.She sits on the rustic seat and waits.DICK,coming softly from the house,approaches her.]

DICK.[Looking at her intently.]Joy!I wanted to say something [Joy does not look at him,but twists her fingers.]

I shan't see you again you know after to-morrow till I come up for the 'Varsity match.

JOY.[Smiling.]But that's next week.

DICK.Must you go home to-morrow?

[Joy nods three times.]

[Coming closer.]

I shall miss you so awfully.You don't know how I--[Joy shakes her head.]

Do look at me![JOY steals a look.]Oh!Joy!

[Again joy shakes her head.]

JOY.[Suddenly.]Don't!

DICK.[Seizing her hand.]Oh,Joy!Can't you--JOY.[Drawing the hand away.]Oh!don't.

DICK.[Bending his head.]It's--it's--so--JOY.[Quietly.]Don't,Dick!

DICK.But I can't help it!It's too much for me,Joy,I must tell you--[MRS.GWYN is seen approaching towards the house.]

JOY.[Spinning round.]It's Mother--oh,Mother!

[She rushes at her.]

[MRS.GWYN is a handsome creature of thirty-six,dressed in a muslin frock.She twists her daughter round,and kisses her.]

MRS.GWYN.How sweet you look with your hair up,Joy!Who 's this?

[Glancing with a smile at DICK.]

JOY.Dick Merton--in my letters you know.

[She looks at DICK as though she wished him gone.]

MRS.GWYN.How do you do?

DICK.[Shaking hands.]How d 'you do?I think if you'll excuse me --I'll go in.

[He goes uncertainly.

MRS.GWYN.What's the matter with him?

JOY.Oh,nothing![Hugging her.]Mother!You do look such a duck.

Why did you come by the towing-path,was n't it cooking?

MRS.GWYN.[Avoiding her eyes.]Mr.Lever wanted to go into Mr.

Henty's.

[Her manner is rather artificially composed.]

JOY.[Dully.]Oh!Is he-is he really coming here,Mother?

MRS.GWYN.[Whose voice has hardened just a little.]If Aunt Nell's got a room for him--of course--why not?

JOY.[Digging her chin into her mother's shoulder.]

[Why couldn't he choose some day when we'd gone?I wanted you all to myself.]

MRS.GWYN.You are a quaint child--when I was your age--JOY.[Suddenly looking up.]Oh!Mother,you must have been a chook!

MRS.GWYN.Well,I was about twice as old as you,I know that.

JOY.Had you any--any other offers before you were married,Mother?

MRS.GWYN.[Smilingly.]Heaps!

JOY.[Reflectively.]Oh!