登陆注册
19495000000092

第92章

When Nell had exhausted her first raptures at this glorious sight, Mrs Jarley ordered the room to be cleared of all but herself and the child, and, sitting herself down in an arm-chair in the centre, formally invested Nell with a willow wand, long used by herself for pointing out the characters, and was at great pains to instruct her in her duty.

'That,' said Mrs Jarley in her exhibition tone, as Nell touched a figure at the beginning of the platform, 'is an unfortunate Maid of Honour in the Time of Queen Elizabeth, who died from pricking her finger in consequence of working upon a Sunday.Observe the blood which is trickling from her finger; also the gold-eyed needle of the period, with which she is at work.'

All this, Nell repeated twice or thrice: pointing to the finger and the needle at the right times: and then passed on to the next.

'That, ladies and gentlemen,' said Mrs Jarley, 'is jasper Packlemerton of atrocious memory, who courted and married fourteen wives, and destroyed them all, by tickling the soles of their feet when they were sleeping in the consciousness of innocence and virtue.On being brought to the scaffold and asked if he was sorry for what he had done, he replied yes, he was sorry for having let 'em off so easy, and hoped all Christian husbands would pardon him the offence.Let this be a warning to all young ladies to be particular in the character of the gentlemen of their choice.

Observe that his fingers are curled as if in the act of tickling, and that his face is represented with a wink, as he appeared when committing his barbarous murders.'

When Nell knew all about Mr Packlemerton, and could say it without faltering, Mrs Jarley passed on to the fat man, and then to the thin man, the tall man, the short man, the old lady who died of dancing at a hundred and thirty-two, the wild boy of the woods, the woman who poisoned fourteen families with pickled walnuts, and other historical characters and interesting but misguided individuals.And so well did Nell profit by her instructions, and so apt was she to remember them, that by the time they had been shut up together for a couple of hours, she was in full possession of the history of the whole establishment, and perfectly competent to the enlightenment of visitors.

Mrs Jarley was not slow to express her admiration at this happy result, and carried her young friend and pupil to inspect the remaining arrangements within doors, by virtue of which the passage had been already converted into a grove of green-baize hung with the inscription she had already seen (Mr Slum's productions), and a highly ornamented table placed at the upper end for Mrs Jarley herself, at which she was to preside and take the money, in company with his Majesty King George the Third, Mr Grimaldi as clown, Mary Queen of Scots, an anonymous gentleman of the Quaker persuasion, and Mr Pitt holding in his hand a correct model of the bill for the imposition of the window duty.The preparations without doors had not been neglected either; a nun of great personal attractions was telling her beads on the little portico over the door; and a brigand with the blackest possible head of hair, and the clearest possible complexion, was at that moment going round the town in a cart, consulting the miniature of a lady.

It now only remained that Mr Slum's compositions should be judiciously distributed; that the pathetic effusions should find their way to all private houses and tradespeople; and that the parody commencing 'If I know'd a donkey,' should be confined to the taverns, and circulated only among the lawyers' clerks and choice spirits of the place.When this had been done, and Mrs Jarley had waited upon the boarding-schools in person, with a handbill composed expressly for them, in which it was distinctly proved that wax-work refined the mind, cultivated the taste, and enlarged the sphere of the human understanding, that indefatigable lady sat down to dinner, and drank out of the suspicious bottle to a flourishing campaign.

同类推荐
  • 儒志编

    儒志编

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 元始天尊济度血湖真经

    元始天尊济度血湖真经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 禅林宝训顺朱

    禅林宝训顺朱

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 太极拳经

    太极拳经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 龙兴慈记

    龙兴慈记

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
热门推荐
  • 重生之废柴嫡女

    重生之废柴嫡女

    她,龙组顶级特工,代号X。一次任务,杀掉一个不良黑商,把国宝青铜鼎带回去时,被吸进了青铜鼎。她,玄月大陆天辰国将军府嫡小姐,本应该是一个受尽万般宠爱的小姐,却因为这个残酷的世界信奉的一条规矩,以武为尊。而这个小姐又是一个无法聚集灵气,无法修炼斗气的废材,自小爹爹失踪,娘也消失,老将军虽然对她万般宠爱,但也不能时时刻刻护着她,将军府里虎视眈眈的夫人小姐也无法消停了。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
  • 武尊天道

    武尊天道

    天谴大陆,在这个世界的大部分人都非同一般,因为他们可以逆天而为──修仙,追求长生不死。更有一些特殊的家族,继承了远古混沌世界大能者的血脉,这些家族生来就有着非凡的能力,这种特殊的能力叫做天赋神技,这种传承神技有的可以斩破山河,窥伺自己或别人的未来;有的可以控制他人灵魂,使人丢下神志成为自己的傀儡;更有的神技可狂化实力,使自己的实力提高到数十倍….看我们的主角如何一步步走向天下。
  • 那片浅草——我的所有回忆

    那片浅草——我的所有回忆

    她,爱他成痴;他,与她同行;初见,相恋,分别,形同陌路......是命运的捉弄,还是注定的缘分,一年后,两人再次相遇,一个是高高在上的总裁,一个是新出炉的职场菜鸟,“我爱你!”“可惜,我不爱你了。”历经了这么多风雨,他们还能在美丽的年华里,绽放出美丽的花吗?如果能,一定要开在——那片浅草。
  • 紫凤舞

    紫凤舞

    绝美出尘神仙师兄俊美温和太子哥哥狡诈腹黑天下首富坚贞守职得力护法邪魅狂妄安玄皇帝锋芒内敛隐忍太子体弱多病多才王爷妖娆无情第一杀手各色美男,争相角逐,权谋诡计,只为神算一语。(本文纯属虚构,请勿模仿。)
  • 邪恶重生:狼王的宠后

    邪恶重生:狼王的宠后

    灵魂出窍吧!她砸死了正牌的狼后,还来个借尸还魂,成了狼王的狼后!洞房花烛,狼王变身大白狼,她两眼一黑,吓昏了过去。谁知醒了之后,得知自己也是个半狼人?既来之则安之,谁承想在怀了一肚子狼崽子之后,身子的正牌主人竟也借尸还魂,找她索命来了!情节虚构,切勿模仿。
  • 空间医女,拐个美男做相公

    空间医女,拐个美男做相公

    第一次救下孙淳,夏藜就着了魔。“长得好帅!”不知不觉,她的口水也流了一地。孙淳冷冷看了她一眼,懒得理她。夏藜软磨硬泡,将他拐到了手心里,跑也跑不了,也越发感觉,这个男人也就一副好看的皮囊,内里也是脓包一个,没少使唤,也经常欺负。哪里想到,变身的魔兽最可怕,斩杀恶弟,夺回属于自己的一切,将她吃干抹净不说,还特爱记仇,要找她一起算总账,悔的她肠子都青了,原来她才是一直被他攥在手心里的人。--情节虚构,请勿模仿
  • 种子下载神器

    种子下载神器

    为了看片,下个种子播放神器然后中了超级无敌宇宙病毒这也算够倒霉的了。但是中病毒后,手机竟然成了神器种子啊种子
  • 雪球专刊第012期:小白投资20讲(进阶篇)

    雪球专刊第012期:小白投资20讲(进阶篇)

    如果你给子孙存入银行1万,年息5%,那么200年后将滚为131.5万,如果国家的货币发行增速保持在10%以上(现在中国广义货币M2余额107万亿,年增速14%),100年后中国货币总量将突破1,474,525万亿,以20亿人口计算,人均存款将突破7.37亿(不含房地产、证券、收藏品及各类资产)。如果按此发行速度货币体系的崩盘只是时间问题,不只是中国乃至全世界都面临货币体系的重建。货币发行增速将逐步下移直至低于2%,每年20%的收益率到那时候中国人才会意识到真不容易。
  • 火爆娇妻:总裁大人宠上瘾

    火爆娇妻:总裁大人宠上瘾

    为了私奔,她不惜逃婚,但是,民政局,等到的却是怀孕的小三!妈蛋,真爱都被喂狗了,一怒之下,她酒吧买醉,谁想到,却遇到了坑逼咸猪手!挣扎的时候,一头撞到某个混蛋怀里,一醉不醒!第二天醒来,光光的自己,光光的男人,怎么回事?就在这时,父母破门而入,捉奸在床?似乎从遇到男人开始,她就霉运连连!先有父母捉奸在床?后有渣男死缠烂打,接着是绑架撕票加非礼,莫名女人用钱砸!混蛋,给我滚出老娘的世界,她正要暴起,却被男人直接推到“我儿子已经认定了,你就是他亲妈……”
  • 校园七大不可思议的魂淡们

    校园七大不可思议的魂淡们

    【本文会在这时候发出来,是为了占坑,后是为了撒网,最后做个比较,嗯,聪明的我】这一天,校园里的七大不可思议为了争夺最不可思议的宝座,展开了不眠不休的斗争。“不过这关我什么事?”“你既然已经看到了我,那就为我们做一个裁判吧!”“请容我拒绝。”“我们已经一致同意了,今天晚上你就可以享受到此生以来最不可思议的一夜了。”“魂淡啊!好歹为正在被罚站的我考虑考虑吧!!!”“……我可以在你考试的时候帮你看看答案哟。”“请务必让我向诸位展示自己的公平与公正!!!”于是,这一天——我因为在罚站时间于走廊内大声喧哗,被叫到教导处接收了狠狠一顿训斥。