登陆注册
16285400000024

第24章

THE room in which she had taken refuge was lit by a single candle on a table.Lying back on a large couch,her dress undone,she held one hand on her heart and allowed the other to hang limply.On the table was a silver basin half full of water.The water was mottled with flecks of blood.

Marguerite,extremely pale and with her mouth half open,was trying to catch her breath.At times,her chest swelled in a long,indrawn sigh which,when released,seemed to afford her some slight relief and left her for a few seconds with a feeling of well-being.

I went to her-she did not stir-sat down and took the hand which was resting on the couch.

'Ah!Is it you?'she said with a smile.

My face must have looked distraught,for she added:

'Aren't you very well either?'

'I'm all right,but how about you?Are you still feeling ill?'

'Not very.'And,with a handkerchief,she wiped away the tears which the coughing had brought to her eyes.'I'm used to it now.'

'You are killing yourself,'I said,and there was emotion in my voice.'I wish I could be your friend,a relative,so that I could stop you harming yourself like this.'

'Ah!There's absolutely no need for you to be alarmed,'she replied bitterly.'You can see how well the others look after me.The truth is they know there's nothing anybody can do about what I've got.'

Thereupon,she got to her feet and,taking the candle,set it on the mantelpiece and looked at herself in the mirror.

'How pale I look!'she said,refastening her dress and running her fingers through her dishevelled hair.'Oh,who cares!Let's go back into supper.Are you coming?'

But I remained seated and did not move.

She realized just how shaken I had been by this scene,for she came up to me and,holding out her hand,she said:

'Don't be silly.Do come.'

I took her hand which I put to my lips,and despite myself I moistened it with a few pent-up tears.

'Well,now!You really are a child!'she said,as she sat down again beside me.'There,you're crying!What's the matter?'

'I must seem very stupid to you,but what I've just seen has made me feel quite dreadful.'

'You are really very kind!But what do you expect?I can't sleep,I've got to take my mind off things for a while.And anyhow,with girls like me,if there's one more or fewer of us,what difference does it make?The doctors tell me the blood I cough is really only bronchial;I pretend I believe them,it's all I can do for them.'

'Listen,Marguerite,'I said then,with an effusion which I was unable to check,'I don't know what sort of influence you might have over my life,but I do know this:at this moment,there is no one,not even my sister,about whom I feel more concerned than you.It's been like that ever since I first saw you.So,in Heaven's name,look after yourself properly,don't go on living as you do.'

'If I looked after myself properly,I'd die.What keeps me going is the pace of the life I lead.In any case,taking care of yourself is all well and good for society ladies who have a family and friends.But women like me are abandoned the moment we're no more use for feeding the vanity or pleasure of our lovers,and then long,empty evenings follow long empty days.I know,believe me.I was in bed for two months;after the first three weeks,no one came to see me any more.'

'I realize that I mean nothing to you,'I went on,'but if you wanted,I'd care for you like a brother,I wouldn't leave you and I'd make you better.And then,when you were strong enough,you could go back to the life you lead now,if that's what you wanted;but of this I am sure-you would come to prefer a quiet life which would make you happier and keep you pretty.'

'You may think like that this evening,because the wine has made you sentimental,but you wouldn't have as much patience as you say you have.'

'Let me remind you,Marguerite,that you were ill for two months and during those two months,I called every day to find out how you were.'

'That's true.But why did you never come up?'

'Because I didn't know you then.'

'But whoever observes such niceties with girls like me?'

'One always observes the niceties with any woman;at least,that's what I believe.'

'So you'd look after me?'

'Yes.'

'You'd stay by me every day?'

'Yes.'

'And even every night?'

'For as long as you weren't tired of me.'

'What would you say that was?'

'Devotion.'

'And where does this devotion come from?'

'From an irresistible attraction that draws me to you.'

'In other words you're in love with me?Just say it straight out,it's a great deal simpler.'

'I may be:but if I ever tell you some day that I do,this is not that day.'

'It would be better for you if you never said it.'

'Why?'

'Because there are only two things that can come from such an admission.'

'And they are?'

'Either I turn you down,in which case you will resent me,or I say yes,in which case you won't have much of a mistress;someone who is temperamental,ill,depressed,or gay in a way that is sadder than sorrow itself,someone who coughs blood and spends a hundred thousand francs a year-which is all very well for a rich old man like the Duke,but it's not much of a prospect for a young man like yourself.And,if it's proof you want,the fact is that all the young lovers I have ever had have never stayed around for very long.'

I did not answer:I listened.Her frankness,which seemed to verge on the confessional,and the dismal life which I half-glimpsed beneath the golden veil that covered its stark reality from which the poor girl sought escape in debauchery,drunkenness and sleepless nights,all made such an impression on me that I could not find a thing to say.

'But come,'Marguerite continued,'we're talking foolish nonsense.Give me your hand and let's go back to the diningroom.The others must be wondering what to make of our absence.'

'Go back,if that's what you want,but please let me stay here.'

'Why?'

'Because I can't bear to see you so bright and cheerful.'

'In that case,I'll be sad.'

同类推荐
  • 南朝金粉录

    南朝金粉录

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 牧令须知

    牧令须知

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 太平两同书

    太平两同书

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 修行本起经

    修行本起经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • History of the Peloponnesian War

    History of the Peloponnesian War

    The State of Greece from the earliest Times to the Commencement of the Peloponnesian War THUCYDIDES, an Athenian, wrote the history of the war between the Peloponnesians and the Athenians, beginning at the moment that it broke out.汇聚授权电子版权。
热门推荐
  • 跟李嘉诚学投资

    跟李嘉诚学投资

    李嘉诚的投资才干是从小培养的,在他当茶楼小伙计的时候,他就有意识地锻炼自己察颜观色的本领,甚至对方还没说话他就能猜透别人的心思,这为他日后大规模的投资打下了基础。因为要想投资准确,稳赚不赔,首先就要具备一双能洞察大局的慧眼。在这个世界上,只有发现商机并果断出手的投资人才能获得成功。无疑,李嘉诚是这方面的佼佼者。
  • 雷罚神剑

    雷罚神剑

    奇异的梦境,神秘的召唤,2012年的现代人萧逸,时刻被梦境所困扰;神奇的异象,未知的世界,同样是穿越,却未能成为帝王、王爷之类;琅嬛星大陆,修真界的存在,地球人的他,步步为营的实现梦想;召唤浮现,秘体出现,用奇异之躯,以传说中的修神之力拯救家族。看2012年的现代人,如何非比寻常的穿越,如何实现修神之梦境。而梦醒时分,一切亦如浮云!
  • 夜蔷薇

    夜蔷薇

    穿越是恐怖的!语彤在2002年常常这么想,就像现在她在XX帝XX年的时代重新坐回草垛子上想的一样,她得再好好想想,先镇定一下思绪,然后再考虑在这个没有苹果机没有哈根达斯没有阿迪没有因特网的时代里该怎么度过,以及没有热水器没有马桶没有空调没有冰箱的世界里该怎么生存。
  • 圣魂传说

    圣魂传说

    故事以少年尘枫的成长为主线,讲述少年、少女们勇闯亚特兰林大陆展开一段热血之路。爱情、友情、亲情伴随着他(她)们的成长。神奇的亚特蓝林大陆等待你来揭开它神秘面纱,探索其中的奥秘。
  • 不是非要嫁给你

    不是非要嫁给你

    她走出校门,他清冷的言语里,是她捉摸不透的深沉。面对宁远的破产危机,她找他谈条件:让出一半以上的股份,他无动于衷。只不紧不慢的吐出四个字“跟我结婚。”她不以为然,但却妥协。之后开始了长达两年的“隐婚”生活,她不带他送的戒指,不和他“出双入对”,甚至还任性的不肯履行夫妻义务。
  • 人玄天道

    人玄天道

    一次奇遇,李云获得了一朵红色火苗,一缕黑色丝线和一滴金色液滴。为了母亲心愿,他踏足修道。为了青梅竹马,他冲破人境桎梏。为了妖媚一族,他破玄通天。随着李云修为步步高升,一个个隐秘逐渐浮出水面,一个更大更广阔浩淼世界的大门慢慢打开。那次奇遇得到的东西到底是什么?他与青梅竹马的丫鬟历经重重磨难,能否终成眷属?魔门圣女一路痴痴跟随能否获得李云内心一片空间?九尾香狐能否与李云上演一段人妖之恋?妖媚一族为何为了李云甘受无边的欺压和凌辱?
  • 若只如初见:简单的幸福

    若只如初见:简单的幸福

    三年蜕变,一场抢人大战爆发!“是我的,你抢不走!”“呵,要试试吗?”“哼,来啊,怕你啊?”许晨无奈地看着两人厮杀,火药味越来越强烈,呜,搞什么啊!!林熙然天天送花给许晨,每天说早安,带着她晨跑,百忙之中抽出时间为她准备生日狂欢。欧阳辰溪自然要更酷炫,抢走林氏的案子,轻而易举让林熙然的计划泡汤,趁着漏洞为许晨遮风挡雨。“晨晨,嫁给我好吗?”“嗯!”看着两人幸福地相拥在一起,欧阳辰溪黯然退场,“没事,我可以一直守护你。”心只有一个,也只属于一个人。<若只如初见:简单的幸福,新书各种求!>
  • 豪门秘恋:权少的盛世专宠

    豪门秘恋:权少的盛世专宠

    沉沉浮浮的宋筱瞳才明白,原来,她跟杜一凡之间隔得不是柯少航,不是苏珍妮,而是在那很多年前就被她亲手葬送的信任,这次,她彻底的离开,带着母亲的误会、杜一凡的误会还有对他的爱……
  • 重生嫡女毒后

    重生嫡女毒后

    上一世,瞎了眼!真情错付,死不瞑目!渣男丈夫和白莲花庶妹苟且陷害,刚满月的儿子被掐断颈骨,她更惨遭凌迟,被丢去乱葬岗!这一世,再重来,仇恨滔天!绝不手软!惩庶母,虐渣男,斗小三!专治各种不服和小人!相府嫡女,涅槃重生!当最善良的人学会狠毒,当最软弱的人硬起心肠,凤眸半挑,素手倾城,欺她害她者,定要千百倍偿还!翻云覆雨中,将自己的命运掌握在自己的手上!且看她锋芒喋血,风华惊天下!
  • 无法纯粹

    无法纯粹

    小说从叶子周年祭日为开始。叶子死因不详,生前好友苏颖、文瑾和若兮只知道她生前深爱过一个男人。三位好友在叶子墓前发现了形色各异的凭吊者,其中三位身份特别,行踪飘忽:60后企业家秦剑,70后知名导演戴维,80后著名歌手兼作家蓝玻。叶子生前三位好友分别对嫌疑人展开一对一接触,多样的都市情感逐渐酝酿、酵生,节外生枝,枝蔓交错,叶子生前的繁复情感历程梦想片段随之不断拼贴,复现而出。在追寻真相之外,三位好友各自不同寻常的生命际遇亦成为小说故事的一部分,一幅映照当下都市男女情感裂变、社会生活骤变的浮世绘缓慢升起……也斑斓,也暧昧。